“Unfriending” Facebook

What do you mean? How could you leave Facebook?! What will you do without constant connection to all your friends and acquaintances and their numberless posts day in and day out? Well, I guess I will just have to wait and see…because I am leaving Facebook for the foreseeable future.

Now for those who’ve been following my business page for Lemon Lane Organics and Lemon Lane Designs, you should have seen my recent post about moving the page. I hope you will join me very soon over at the new FB location here. I will still post news about upcoming patterns and new items for sale there. But my personal account will be no more at the end of this week.

I have to admit that this has been a difficult decision for me, and it took a long time for me to finally come to the point where I was ready to let go of this mode of social media. Many people are probably wondering why I am doing it, so I thought I’d write up some of my main reasons here as an answer to those unspoken questions. Besides, it will provide me with a good reminder if I am tempted to go back in the future.

First and foremost, I don’t believe that I have been honoring God with the time I have been spending (or more accurately, wasting) on Facebook. Instead, I think it has, for me, become somewhat of an online addiction…being one of the first things I feel the need to check in the morning and one of the last things I look at every night. And who knows how many times a day I mindlessly click back again to scroll through and see if anyone has posted anything new, interesting or not. There are ever so many more beneficial and uplifting ways I could be spending my time each day, but I will admit I have a lack of self control in this area. I know social media is a tool and can be used for good or evil, but for me it has become too much of a master. I desire to give God and my family the best and most of the time He has so graciously given me, and the temptation to waste that time on Facebook is just far too tempting.

Second, I often find after reading posts from friends, acquaintances or even businesses or public figures that I have a vague sense of dissatisfaction with my own life. Again, these are my personal struggles and weaknesses, and I hope that most people cannot identify with my feelings. But it is hard for me sometimes to look at others’ lives and wish perhaps just a little that I could be more, do more, have more, etc. Comparing myself, my accomplishments or my earthly possessions to those of others is rarely helpful or positive, so why keep focussing on those things when my focus should be on Christ and His immeasurable grace? When my eyes are on Him, I am always satisfied because He is all I really need!

Third, I fear that because of our society’s focus on virtual “relationships” we have lost the desire and ability to really build true and lasting personal relationships with those around us. For an introvert like me, it is far easier and more comfortable to sit at home in my jammies, typing status updates and brief comments on others’ “timelines” than it is to actually make a phone call or make a play date or just drop by a friend’s house. Those things take more planning, effort and at times, personal sacrifice…but aren’t those things more meaningful and memorable anyway? I would like to return to a more personal, simple way of interacting with people, even if that means that I have to be more intentional about it and go out of my comfort zone to initiate interaction with the people in my church and community. And instead of just knowing about people because I have read their status updates and seen pictures of their kids and grand kids, I want to really get to know them personally because I have talked with them, spent time with them over a meal, laughed and cried and lived life together in community. I really think that is how God designed us in the first place. He made man because He wanted fellowship with us, and He created woman because man needed fellowship with someone like himself. We are created to live in community, and I don’t think Facebook quite fits the bill, at least not for me.

I have a lot more thoughts on this topic, as you can probably tell by my somewhat rambling monologue…. But those are the major reasons that I will be deleting my personal account. It is just time for some changes, and this is one that I am ready to embrace. I hope that those who’ve plugged on and read all of this understand some of my thoughts and do not judge me too harshly for sharing my personal weaknesses. Perhaps some of you have struggled with some of the same things and will take a moment to reevaluate the place of social media in your own life. It took a friend (who I met online, by the way!) leaving Facebook herself this past week to encourage me that I could do it, too. I even took another of her ideas and will be starting a private blog just for friends and family so that those who live farther away can still easily see pictures of Little J and get updates on our family! I think I will like doing that a lot more than Facebook, and I am already brainstorming my first post! 🙂 Change is good, especially when you know it is the right thing for you to do. So, Facebook, I guess it’s time for you and I to change our relationship status!

5 thoughts on ““Unfriending” Facebook

  1. Kiel, I stand with you in this decision! I am so thankful for living in a far away place because it helped me to see my tendencies so much clearer.For those things that I could see were my time-robbers, I have just said “no” to them. I just do not put the temptations in front of me as much as I can. That does not mean it is perfect or miss things, but it is worth it for Him!! I am so happy for your decision. Way to go sister, you are glorifying Him!!

  2. Kiel, I am so proud of you for making your decision. I know it’s hard to let go of things others are doing and sometimes you can feel judged for not doing the “in thing”. I have felt the same way you have sometimes when I see other’s posts. Like why can’t I do those things or get that much done in a day! Satan tries to use whatever means even social media for us to become dissatisfied. Leaveing fb is something I’ve thought about too. Maybe in the near future I will be making the same decision. God Bless! I look forward to your blog.

  3. Kiel, I respect your decision. I need to look real close at myself and not be on fb so much like you said, every evening. I need to work on not logging on every evening.

  4. Kiel, I totally understand and I will miss connecting with you on facebook, if you feel convicted about your relationship with facebook, it is time to let it go. Thank you for being so honest about it, and I will be looking forward to your blog so I can keep up with you guys!! Give Josiah a big hug from us and tell Paul hi, and we miss you guys a whole lot!

  5. Very good points, Kiel. I used to be on Facebook SO much. I’m not on it all that much anymore. I don’t think people should judge you for deleting… I’m not saying they won’t.. I’m just saying they’re silly if they do. You’re a wonderful person. =) I love blogging. And I’d definitely be interested in reading yours!

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